Day 5 in Beijing: The Bridge

The RoadThis is the view from the bridge looking towards where I live.  One of the benefits of having a brother live here is that he has a place and I arrived knowing that I had somewhere to live.  His place is pretty obvious since it is one of the high rises that has the huge arch on top of it.  They are visible from quite a distance away and it makes it easy to find my way around the neighborhood when I’m a bit confused.

This is a view from one of the bridges that I use to cross the street as it can be pretty dangerous if you are new to the area since the road rules are very different than in the States.  An example of this is the red light right turn: the driver has right of way and does not stop.  So, if one is to cross the road and expects the driver to give way, they are sorely mistaken.  Luckily I was told this rule on the second day and have not had any trouble adjusting to it as I just keep my head on a swivel and try to be as aware as possible.  Definitely no talking, texting or browsing on the old iPhone as I walk around at this point.

If you look closely, off in the distance, there is a smokestack that is dead center.  There is a really nice interplay of colors and textures in this city and this picture captures a little bit of that.

Day 4 in Beijing: Bank Accounts and The Luck of a Wireless Phone Number.

Sunday.  A day of rest.  Not so much.

BankingIt was time to get a bank account.  On a Sunday, no less.  Banks, on a Sunday?  Yep, in China, banks are open on Sundays.  They are open seven days a week actually.  My brother’s wife, Shan Shan, helped me with this issue and the following wireless phone ordering also.  It would have been impossible without her and I owe her a debt of gratitude.  She led the way and did all the talking and told me where to sign and what my account would do for me.  Basically it is simply checking and an ATM card and that is all I need at this point.  The attendant seemed to find it enjoyable to be opening the account and smiled and laughed a lot at the little mistakes I made when asked to do something.

 

I also needed to get my new mobile phone number.  I’ve been borrowing a sim card and it was time to get my own one and my own phone number.  There are many different plans in China and it is very confusing.  Shan Shan and I had to decide which plan would be the best and we decided on a monthly plan to start and then possibly a multi-year contract in a month or so which is an excellent bargain.  I then was asked to pick a phone number and was told it would cost about sixty dollars to get a phone number.  I was given a piece of paper with about 80 different combinations and decided on a number with a lot of the number “4” in it because it was easy to remember.  The clerk told Shan Shan and me that not only was that number free because Chinese people don’t like the number “4” but I will get two dollars off my monthly bill for the same reason!  Shan Shan had no idea and had never heard of this deal before but since the number did not have a “8” in it it wasn’t a “lucky” number.  I do have one “6” in it so it is a little bit lucky.

As far as I’m concerned, it is extremely lucky number because it saved me about 200 dollars a year!

 

Day 3 in Beijing: Forbidden City and The Temple of Heaven

Since I just got here, and my brother had some friends in town, we all decided to do the touristy thing and went to the Temple of Heaven and the Forbidden City.  I can try to explain, with words, the grandeur, beauty, power and how awe inspiring these buildings are but I’d rather let the pictures speak for themselves.

These first five are from The Temple of Heaven:

The Seven Stones Green Bricks The Temple of Heaven The Temple of Heaven The Temple of Heaven

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

These five are from the Forbidden City:

IMG_3025 IMG_3010 IMG_2985 IMG_2980 IMG_3048

 

Day 2 in Beijing: The New Job.

After arriving approximately 36 hours ago in Beijing, I started my new job today.

I thought I’d be hired to work part-time as almost all the other clinicians work part-time and that was discussed before coming over to China.  Instead, I was offered a full-time position!  I have to say it was a total surprise and I’m overjoyed to be a full-time employee at this international healthcare company.

I met many of my coworkers and am incredibly impressed with the professionalism of this company.  Everyone is incredibly friendly and very conscientious.  The office building is only about four years old and it is gorgeous inside.

The first floor is the reception, assistance/phone call center, and Japanese medical staff.  This is where clients will call in with any type of question and talk to professionals about their options.

The second floor is the medical staff and psychology.  We have a lot of people from different cultures and therefore the agency is set up to have doctors and clinicians that can speak many different languages.  The medical staff has everything from dentistry to radiology.  Again, I’m truly impressed.

The third floor is mostly business and professional staff.  It is a very open room with lots of air space and glass meeting rooms.

I am looking forward to working with everyone and meeting my first client as soon as possible.

 

Day 1 in Beijing: A little walking, a little shopping, and a little ballet.

I woke up in a new city and a new life.  Obviously, many remnants of my old life remain and I’m taking the parts that I liked with me and leaving behind the ones that I didn’t like or want to bring with me.  It is one of the true benefits of traveling; you can be whomever you want.

I think the core of me is still the same.  A person never really escapes who they are when they travel because they will make connections with people that allow them to continue to be the person they were, at least in many cases.  I’m trying to do that and expand my horizons in many ways while I spend my first three years here in Beijing.

To do that I went out with my brother and did some walking around the neighborhood.  I went to a few stores and bought some things that I need to start my life here.  Nothing special, just hangers, shaving cream, hair gel and the like.  I’ve been spending a good amount of time cleaning up my room and putting clothes away.  I’m close to done and have to thank my friend Jill for helping me pack everything in a very compact manner.  She’s done a lot of traveling and I’m convinced I was able to put so much into my luggage only because of her suggestions and our figuring out fun ways to pack.  One of the ways to do that was to put shirts and socks inside my shoes because the shoes end up taking up so much space and I didn’t want to crush them as they are quite nice and very comfortable.  As I’ve been unpacking, my brother’s dog, Leo, has been my constant companion.  He is extremely cute and very friendly.

800px-National_Grand_TheatreTonight I saw the Berlin Ballet at the Egg in Beijing.  The dance performance was fantastic and the Egg is amazing.  It is the National Centre for the Performing Arts and a work of art.  Then tomorrow I start my new job and meet my coworkers.

7 Days to Beijing: Final Group Supervision

I am a fan of David Burns’ style of therapy.  He is famous for the book,  The Feeling Good Handbook, and is a master at therapy.  All of his work is based on research, testing and is verifiable so it is easy to see when you are helping a client and when you are not.  In fact, clients rate the therapist and the usefulness of therapy after each session.  He uses a lot of empathy before using any techniques or tools with clients because it seems so many people go unheard and so many therapists, including me, miss so much of what our clients.  He has a very specific way of doing empathy and it is similar to Motivational Interviewing.

In regards to this therapy, I have been going to a supervision group, led by the amazing Brac Selph, PhD, for the last three years.  They have become like family to me.  This was going to be my last supervision with the group before I leave for Beijing and it is also Brac’s last group also.  He is an amazing therapist, superviser, and dare I say, friend.  I am honored and humbled ot have learned from such a brilliant, dedicated and kind person.

The group met and discussed endings, finality and what we have learned and what matters to us.  What I love about this group is that everyone is comfortable and is willing to be vulnerable and we work on personal work as well as client work.  We do not talk about clients as much as we play them live so we can get a better idea of how we, as therapists and people, have missed what our clients need and our own projections and beliefs of what the clients should be doing are actually hurting our clients and reducing the effectiveness of the work we do.  We learn that our egos, and our inability to be honest and vulnerable, is often the cause of the problem with our clients.  It sounds easy to be vulnerable but it is truly an art and this group has helped me become much more proficient in it.

I will be sad to leave this group but it seems to be the right time for me.  I feel like they are also a part of my family that I’m leaving but it is for the right reason and allows me closure as I start this new chapter in my life.  I have learned, through therapy, studying, and this group, that all is impermanent and there is no truth out there.  Life is what you make it and to take in emotions deeply, live and die with them in that second, and let go.  Be at peace, treat others with respect and care, and move forward as best you can.

11 Days to Beijing: The Doggies

We all have friends and family that we must say goodbye to when we leave and that can induce sadness and grief when getting ready to travel. However, my housemate has three dogs that I have grown to love and cherish.  The are all very cute and wonderful in their own way and, like humans, have their own distinct personalities.  All three were adopted through Milo Foundation which saves animals from shelters and does not allow them to be euthanized.

The first one is Luna.  Luna is about a year and a half old chihuahua  She entered our household about 9 months ago and was about half the size she is now.  She was absolutely tiny and has grown into a normal size chihuahua now.  She is incredibly friendly and kind and is not a “yippy” dog and quite quiet.  She also has the ability to smile when she is happy and often welcomes me home with a huge silly smile and a wagging tail.

The second is Lucita.  She is a beagle mix and reminds me of Doby from Harry Potter.  She is also incredibly kind and makes the cutest noises.  She doesn’t bark a lot but instead makes little grumble like noises.  She is very cuddly and likes to run at full speed around the yard and the house.  She’s very low to the ground so she looks like a missile when she is cruising and taking corners.

The last is Che.  Che is a cattle dog and lost his leg when he was shot.  He is incredibly smart and a great watch dog.  He also is incredibly fast and track down balls without any problems even though he is missing a leg.  He definitely thinks he is a human and will do silly barks that sound like he is trying to have a full conversation.  Especially when he is about to be fed.

I will miss each of these wonderful animals and know that they have been of great comfort to me and, I hope, I have been to them also.

12 Days to Beijing: Connecting and closing down.

Since I received my Visa, I have been making significant progress on my move to Beijing.  I have been researching different options to connect with people here in the states and making sure they can contact me without breaking the bank.  I noticed that Skype had a program for unlimited calls to the U.S. and Canada for 2.99 a month or 30 dollars for a year.  After signing up for this, I also signed up for a Skype phone number that is local to the San Francisco Bay Area so they can call me toll free.

This takes a bit of explaining so give me a bit here:  The number I have now is a 510 area code.  That is Oakland/Berkeley, California, where I have lived the last 15 years or so.  Most my friends either live in this area or know my area code and are used to it.  So, when they call me, they will call the 510 area code and be connected to my phone, even if I’m in China, and there is no delay or extra charge.  It is rather amazing and a wonderful use of technology that will end up costing me $60.00 a year to get phone calls, and to make phone calls, back to the U.S. from anywhere that I am as long as I have wi-fi or a 3G connection on my phone.  I can also use the video conferencing on my phone or computer with Skype and connect that way.  I’ve made a few calls today and there was no delay and the clarity was perfect.

As to closing down: I’ve been shutting down my old phone service, my car insurance, moving bank accounts as needed, changing addresses and information for contacting me so that there won’t be problems when I move to Beijing and have bills or refunds sent to the wrong address.  There are a lot of little changes that take time but I’m almost done with them.  I’m glad that I decided to become FUNemployed for the last few months so I can relax, have time to make changes without stress, and say goodbye to the people I care about.  It has been a wonderful experience connecting with old friends and spending time with them.  My family has been very supportive and everything seems to be falling into place.

I have been fortunate to have the friends, family and support system that I’ve had in my life.  I know that, in an emergency, I will always have someone to help me out and I believe that is because I have done my best to help and support others in their time of need.  My job as a therapist and social worker made moral sense to me because that is how I see the world; I have a willingness to listen and skills to teach that might help you and I believe you can overcome your problems.  We all need help and we all need to connect.

As for connecting  knowing I already have a phone number and a way to stay connected before I make this move, makes it feel much safer and much more real.